MY CONSTANT

After Last Thursday's Lost episode, "The Constant" I got to thinking, Hmm...what would be *MY* constant? You know if ever I were to go time trippin' through my mind from the past to the present to the future and back again. Like good old Des. My god, Desmond looked gorgeous in the "present" with his long flowing hair and opened to the crotch shirt. He probably freaked out in the helicopter when he realized how good looking he was! But I digress. If I were to have a Constant I would have to pick the one thing that would be there no matter what. The one thing that wouldn't die, or turn its back on me, or disappear into another dimension. That thing is Pepsi. Yes Pepsi, you are my Constant. And Pepsi Manufacturers, I am available to do commercials no matter what the decade. Just don't ask me to wear bell bottoms. I do have some standards!


NO, I'M F**KING BEN AFFLECK!

Sorry Jimmy Kimmel but your old news! Not only am I doing Ben, I'm also doing Matt Damon. And if your girlfriend Sarah Silverman was any good looking, I'd be doing her too!!! So you can pretend all you want and put out as many videos on Youtube as you want, we both know the REAL truth!

SEMI-PRO

No, I'm not talking about me taking money for Sex! HA HA. You silly!!! I'm talking about the new Wil Ferrell movie! I saw this on Friday night and I am happy to report that I was entertained. Wil Ferrell you have fulfilled your duty as comedian. No, it wasn't the most original of concepts, but it did make me laugh my ass off. I don't think this was due to the fact that I was happy to finally be out of the house after all the snow, but feel free to argue the point with me. The movie was alot like Ferrell's other flicks Anchorman, Blades of Glory and Talledaga Nights. I thought all three movies were hysterical so this is good news for Ferrell fans. Without giving anything away, I will say that the funniest parts of the movie were with the bear. As in Grizzly. Make sure you stay when the credits role or you'll miss out on the remaining laughs.